Ten Minutes Too Late, Part VI

December 23, 2009

I love Suvarnabhumi International Airport. It's true! I adore this airport as much as it's possible to like a place. It is clean and orderly, easy to navigate. Staff are polite and helpful. It has shops where people like to shop and food people can enjoy eating. Beyond these practicalities, it's a place full of promise. Arriving, I have always felt joyful. All Bangkok to explore and enjoy — what could be better? But today, I can only repeat the sad marathon I did in India. This baggage claim area is sparkling and insect-free, a sharp contrast to poor dirty dingy Chennai. I wait watchfully by the carousel. I pull my suitcase up as quickly as I can, and run through the building, down long shining halls, down an escalator and up another, to arrive, panting, at the checkin counter. My flight is on Air Bangkok, a no-frills budget brand, chosen for economy. The journey from Bangkok to Siem Reap is short, after all. No need for soft seats, or food. A little empathy might be nice, though I don't expect it. I am informed, brightly and cheerfully, that I have missed my flight by a mere seven minutes, and will have to wait until the next day to fly. Then I am sent to another counter.

I walk slowly. Missed by seven minute. Surely Air India could have done a little better, and shaved seven minutes off a six-hour delay? Or could I have run faster? Couldn't I have avoided this second mass of uncertainty and expense, another day of worrying my family? Tears rise in the back of my throat. I cannot cry here, in the most public of places, in front of hoards of happy tourists. I swallow hard.

The woman at the booking counter accepts my papers and starts to scold me for missing my flight. I have been in Asia long enough to understand this piece of social interaction, and to know how I ought to respond. But today I cannot. The required deflection, the half-apology are not there. The unfairness of delayed flights, the dollars pouring from my never-full pockets, the worry of my still far-away family, the uncertainty that they've received my message, is too much to bear. I try to explain what really happened, knowing the woman behind the counter will not understand, but I am unable to stop myself. She looks at me with disapproval and disbelief, and begins her reproach all over again.

I have no answer. The tears press up and up until they are rolling down my cheeks. Now the woman at the counter regards me with round-eyed horror. So does the woman at the desk to her right, and the man on the other side of her. No one else notices the crazy foreign woman weeping in the airport.

Perhaps Air Bangkok employees are taught a protocol for dealing with distraught passengers, but I doubt it. It is simply that they have failed to stop me from disgracing myself, and now they must mitigate any shame my bad behavior might reflect onto them. Together, they silently decide to get rid of me as quickly as they can. The Air Bangkok woman demands my credit card. The woman next to her announces that I need a hotel room and selects one for me. She goes through the motions of showing me the pictures in her catalog and explaining that it is the best choice, because it is near the airport and has a shuttle that will get me to the airport on time in the morning, and of course she can give me a good discount.

I have never stayed in an airport hotel in any city. In Bangkok, I know some hotels in Chinatown and even in the backpacker district that will cost a fraction of what this room will cost. But there is the expense of the taxis, and with that, the uncertainty of navigating Bangkok traffic well enough to get back here in time. My new flight leaves painfully early in the morning. The calculus of comparing what I would well be able to do on my own with what this woman is offering fails me.

That isn't why I choose to do as she says, though. It is not because I am weak-willed, or cannot do math in my head. I choose the airport hotel, expensive and characterless, because it will not taint my memories of Bangkok. I am assured that I will make my flight. More than that, I am submitting to the impossibility of the situation. The last moment when I truly had a chance to avoid this whole mess was when I pressed the “buy now” button on the SpiceJet web page. Since then, the whole affair has been out of my hands. Let it stay there. There is no need for me to pretend to be responsible for what happens next.

The pain in my stomach subsides a little as I wait for the hotel shuttle bus. I climb in behind an American family. The husband and wife are bickering. She doubts the wisdom of staying at this airport hotel, and would have preferred a place in town. The husband impassively insists that his choice is the better one, but does not elaborate on why. Perhaps he himself is doubtful. Their children, pre-teens, are made querulous by their parents' disagreement, mild as it is, and interject irrelevant little complaints when they can. I endure.

Continued.

No matter how well you plan...

...you can't plan for everything.

I have a lovely, quiet morning at the Queen's Gallery and Loha Prasat, and exactly the lunch that I want at the cute Chinese chain restaurant on the corner. It is passion fruit juice, pork roasted, fried and in sausage with cucumbers and plenty of chilies, plus coconut ice cream. The flecks of coconut are dyed pink and pale green for gaiety, but the flavor is rich, slightly smoky, and sublime.

But success like that can only breed arrogance, I guess. I think I'll finally see the Grand Palace, and perhaps take a look at Wat Phra Kaew along the way. Even the Wat defeats me. I pause outside to pull on my little nylon shrug, a gesture of politeness, I think, to cover my almost bare shoulders. A man on his way out gestures at me impatiently with his stick of meatballs, an early afternoon snack. "Go in," he urges. "It's free!" (In retrospect I am sure he meant well.) My heart sinks. I trot forward, still struggling with my jacket. A little further on I pause to adjust a sleeve. A man sitting near pipes up. "Go in, go in! To your left! It's free!" He is an older man, a little plump and quite contented-looking. He shows no sign of wishing to get up. But I scurry away, hoping to escape. Foolish. A bright-eyed woman in front of me turns and waves. All Thailand can't be focused on luring me into one temple, can they? But the lady is. She insists that I follow her, does not allow me to hang back, and demands to know where I am going next, right where we are, plopped down at the feet of the Buddha in the temple. She scolds me for booking tours through my hotel, points out the cheaper tourist office on my map, and then derides my plan to go to the Grand Palace. I will wait for a ticket for at least an hour, and then have no time to see anything. Bad idea! Have I seen the standing Buddha?

Yes, I say lamely, unfolding the map further to show her where. No, no. That isn't the right one. She points out a Wat near Dusit, shows me her holy card of the place, and then points out two others. One, the Golden Mount, I saw years ago, the victim of a convincing tout. It is next door to the places I had visited early in the day, but I had skipped it. Why relive bad memories?

I thank her as graciously as I can, but deflect her questions about where I might go next. After a moment she turns to say her prayers, and I run.

I run out a different door than the one we came in. I turn left, taking a path through an amulet market, skipping over dogs and sucking in my breath to get around monks, who must not be touched, however accidentally. I dodge soldiers with equal care. All hard eyes and hard abs, they should be the opposite of the monks, but are not. Untouchables, all. Or I am, at any rate.

At last, the amulets are behind me. It is no less crowded. Flowers to one side, food to the other. But I can't stop here. I slip through an opening, hoping to look at my map and come up with a plan, but it's impossible. A tuk-tuk driver with a fake American accent rushes to my side. Probably a foreign woman alone is an easy mark. Most days, that is. Not today. He outlines the same program as the lady in the temple, failing to mention the craft shop he will insist that I visit along the way.

I thank him sweetly and assure him that I now know where I am--he has pulled out his own map, as mine is sadly tattered--and re-enter the market the way I came.

Before me sits a man stringing those little white flowers into tiny garlands. I don't know what the flowers are. They are not jasmine, and have an odd shape. I have never seen them in India, but in Southeast Asia they are auspicious, and form the standard collar for a bottle of Fanta offered at a little spirit house. But they are not what stop me. Before him sits a bucket of plastic-wrapped bouquets of gardenias. Only one flower shows on many a bunch, and some look a bit brown. But others do not. The gentleman names his price, 20 baht for one bunch, in a disapproving tone that tells me this is high. Not to me! I gesture at a bunch that has a fresh flower facing upwards, and pay. I run to the pier, half intending to get the boat to pier 15 and walk to the temple where everyone seems to want me to go today. But as I dig for change, I see the cross-river ferry pull up, and remember the pretty white Wat and the coffee shop across the way. I toss three baht at the fare collector and run to the boat. She pays no attention, does not mind what the stupid foreigner does. In this case it's what all the Thais do, so why bother?

Now I've made the right decision. I loosen my bouquet as we float across and see more than three fresh flowers. (In the end there are more than six. My room smells like heaven!)

On the other side, I skip over sandbags, trying to keep my toes dry. A beautiful Thai woman sells me an iced coffee, and I join the drinking, snacking throngs going about their business. The temple is full. The moment to make merit is at hand. In the two foreshrines, people are gilding the Buddahs and offering orchids and marigolds. I would buy a leaf of gold if I could figure out how, but I can't. And I daren't offer a gardenia. I have never seen it done, and my flowers may be inauspicious. (White!)

So I catch the ferry up with all my flowers. I have decided to go to the big Buddha, if I can. He is not all that easy to find. But I do it, passing two disgruntled Russians on the way. They have ditched their cheating tuk-tuk driver at the temple and are arguing about whose fault it was they got swindled. I don't understand a word, but I know that's what they're saying. There is no other reason for a foreigner, a tourist, to be walking on this particularly grey Bangkok street. And I've done the same myself, after all.

As I find the temple a tuk-tuk passes me. The couple inside looks grim. On the way in, they whisper together, arguing about what they ought to do. I hang back, and wait for them to move on. I edge up to the shoe-leaving area, drop my sandals, and move forward. I edge back and forth, hoping to see the spot for my flower. Two Korean boys come forward, equally frightened of being disrespectful. But they take photos, and I watch a cat claw the rug near Buddha's left toe. When the boys are done, I slide down to the left side, and kneel. I salute the cat, place my freshest gardenia in the most humble place, between the Buddha's smallest left toes, and brush my fingertips on his little toe.

The Korean boys have been watching. They comment on what I have done before they go, but I cannot measure what they say. I stand, and look back uncertainly. I have seen people photographing the leaf of gold or offering they gave. But a voice says leave it, let it go. So I do. I look back and see my gardenia, beautiful against the gold. And then I go on. It's finished.

Eggs really do grow on trees

Bangkok, 22 October 2010, somewhere between Hua Lamphong station and the foot of Yaowarat road.

Bayern, somewhere near the Czech border, Easter 2010.